First Grade 1977

Hopper starts first grade next week. What's kind of weird about it for me is that I remember what MY first day of first grade was like, pretty vividly actually.  I had just turned six and my mom had gotten me this cool sundress/hat/sunglasses combo for my birthday that I insisted on wearing on the first day of school.  Behold..

My I'm So Awesome I'm Wearing Elton John's Vacation Wear bravado wore off about five seconds into the day when I found out that instead of getting Mrs. Williams for my teacher, I had been assigned Mrs. McAllister. Mrs. McAllister was somewhere in the vicinity of 246 years old and she did not like children. Particularly, she wasn't fond my older brother, who she remembered having in her class four years earlier.  Her first words to me were, "I hope you're nothing like that brother of yours or it's going to be a long year, now take off those ridiculous sunglasses."  So welcoming.

Shortly after this exchange, the Screamer arrived. The Screamer was not happy about his mom leaving him in the care of Crones-R-Us and proceeded to blubber endlessly for like thirty straight minutes until Mrs. McAllister made me read him a book about baby chickens to calm him down. Don't ask me how I remember that the book was about baby chickens or that the Screamer's name was Joe Cole, I just  remember that he was crying so hard that when I asked him his name I thought he said "Joe Cool" and I was a big Snoopy fan at the time, so it stuck with me.

I remember lots of names of my first grade classmates. For example, there was a girl named Candida who sat next to me. I thought Candida was a really exotic and beautiful name. I did not know at the time that Candida was named after a something causes fungal disease. I'm pretty sure Candida did not know this either. I often thought of Candida in later years wondering how middle school went for her.

I remember a slightly chubby boy named Chad who told me in the cafeteria line that he was going to marry me and didn't even tattle on me when I punched him in the stomach in response. That Chad, such a gentleman.

I remember such very specific things about First Grade. I remember that I initially had a lot of trouble substituting lower case "d" for lower case "b" and that bitch Mrs. McAllister made me stand in the corner when I couldn't get it right.The injustice!  I remember that the very first book I checked out of the school library on my own was "A Fly Went By" and it took me at least three days to read it. I remember playing Duck Duck Goose in PE. I remember my astonishment and joy when I found out I could refuse to eat the green beans at lunch and no one was going to tell my mom.

I guess my point is, all of these things have stuck with me almost...cough.. forty years, so I know how much of an impression it's all going to have on the Hop.  So, I hope that his first day, he's not the Screamer. I hope his teacher is less than century old and likes kids, just a little bit. And I really hope that when picture day arrives, he can come close to the amount of Derp I had.


First Grade, 1977

I feel fairly sure my boy can handle it.

The Struggle

Do you have any idea how brutal it is to go from somewhere where the high temperature is 78 degrees to a place like Texas in August?  Yesterday, we had to get out of the pond because the boys got too shivery. Right now, it is 103 in Austin and my eyelids are sweating. 

As per usual, I did not check in as much from the farm as I had planned, and yet, there are 422 photos I'm trying to upload and process and stick cartoony stars over my kids' tushies. I'm always trying to get photos of the boys together where they're both looking a) at the camera and b) Rowan is not screaming. We came VERY CLOSE to achieving this at the farm.

Ok, not that close.

There were moments.

And then you realize that someone has lunch remnants on his face.

BUT I WILL TAKE WHAT I CAN GET

you might think that last one or two is cute, but have you gotten to the point when you notice that one of them is pinching his own butt cheeks?   Basically, I've just gotten to where I know that my fantasies of cute smiley photographs of well behaved children just aren't going to happen. At least not of MY children.  it's OK. I'll take substance over style any day.

Farm Blogging, pt 2

Our time at the farm is almost up! It's been sort of speeding by, specifically, when we went to Jiminy Peak and rode the mountain roller coaster, things were speeding by in a corkscrew, nausea-making fashion.. But to back up, we've also gone to "the beach" (at Grafton Lake)

And we've had lots of cousins and family time. The boys always like fresh meat to conquer and somehow talk into chasing them.

But back to the mountain coaster of doom..Rowan is a child who previously would refuse to get on a carousel because they were "too scary." We could not get this kid off the mountain coaster.all.day. Over and over, we were  having to ride this thing pretty much til Mom had to stop (before I barfed.) 

Not to be outdone, Hopper also enjoyed hurtling his tiny little scrawny body through time and space. 

I only had about 12 heart attacks that day. 

Today we're just relaxing. I can tell I am still on vacation because my last meal consisted of a brownie and a beer. 

I'm going to milk this for yet another day.

Farm Blogging 2015

I'm a little late logging in from the farm, mainly because it is hard to type when I'm in a reclining position, and also, I left my laptop at home. Rest assured we've been busy doing a whole lotta nothing besides tromping through the woods naked (the boys, not me).

We did take a little detour to Saratoga Springs on Tuesday and that was a neat day--we saw some morning workouts at the track

And then we got to spend the day with an old Austin friend of Sam's who took us on a tour. It's such a lovely little town

Even though some of the springs of Saratoga taste a little like fart water

But all in all: lovely day. Right up to the time we got home, went swimming at the pond and Hop got stung by a wasp right on the nose. Good times. He was a little skeptical of my "slap some mud on it " home remedy, but it did work. 

Now he only asks about 40 times every five minutes whether we are SURE wasps die when they lose a stinger and whether or not they're going to remember him and hold a grudge.

Yesterday we spent some time at MassMOCA. Hopper liked it. Rowan kept asking the docents where the "bug tents" were. There was some confusion on that end because we are pretty sure those don't exist.

They have yet to take a bath here at the farm because a) there is no bathtub and b) Rowan refuses to try the shower, but we are making do.

We are also adding soap to the slip and slide because why not. 

There has also been a very large amount of food that I have neglected to photograph because I am too busy shoving it in my mouth. Still more fun to come!