Get a Rope

What I want to know is:

When is Texadelphia just going to come out and admit that they use Pace picante sauce?? Why bother putting it in the little condiment holders? It's PACE. You're not fooling anyone. I can tell. You know why? Because Pace sucks. You know how I know that? I lived in Arkansas for 23 years and at that time we had no other kind of "salsa" available to us unless you saved the packages of hot sauce they gave you at Taco Bell. (we didn't know any better). Trust me, I know the taste. Pace has a very distinctively sucky blend of bell peppers, onions and zero actual flavor. It's an abomination to have it exist in a town that loves hot sauce so much that it has its own festival. Go to the grocery store, get you some tomatoes, 1/2 an onion, some garlic and some chiles and mash it all up with lime juice. My dog could make salsa.(Hudson, not Fergus. Fergus would drool on the garlic). So can you. Seriously. It's that easy. Just quit it with the Pace.