The Christmas Meme

1. Egg Nog or Hot Chocolate? Scotch.

2. Does Santa wrap presents or just sit them under the tree? Wraps. He doesn't wrap well or usually with anything that doesnt have classified ads or, um, plastic aliens on it, but we don't judge on those things around here.

3. Colored lights on tree/house or white? depends on if you want me to get around to taking them down before March. I find you can get a little more mileage out of the white.

4. Do you hang mistletoe? only if I can get the real stuff, but the only way I know how to do it is to shoot it down with a bb gun (hi, I'm from Arkansas, did I mention?) my neighbors don't appreciate that as much..

5. When do you put your decorations up? the 15th...or not

6. What is your favorite holiday dish? I know this is kinda gross, but I love that canned cranberry stuff that comes out as can-shaped until you mash it with a fork. I like to put it on turkey sammiches.

7. Favorite Holiday memory as a child: My parents locking the four of us in the bathroom so my dad could stomp around on the roof hollering HO HO HO while my mom ran and put the presents under the tree. It's a toss-up between that and how my sister and I used to find the Burl Ives Christmas Tape in the decorations box before my mom saw it and hid it til just after New Years Day. We did this for years.

8. When and how did you learn the truth about Santa? The year my dad almost fell off the roof. It went something like this: HO HO Holy Shit Mother of Christ---HEEEEELLLP OH MY GOD *&*$^@!! BONNIEEEEEE!!!! I was probably 6-ish?

9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve? Yes

10. How do you decorate your Christmas Tree? willy nilly

11. Snow! Love it or Dread it? Love It! When it's somewhere else.

12. Can you ice skate? No, but I can ice drag.

13. Do you remember your favorite gift? No. I can remember the funny gifts (remember the matching penguin sweatshirts and pink legwarmers?? how 'bout when Aunt Elsie kept sending me the train sets even when I was EIGHT because mom didn't have the heart to remind her that Lee is also a GIRL'S name and Aunt Elsie was like, 95 then).

14. What’s the most important thing about the Holidays for you? That people are nicer to each other and are better about remembering folks we should be remembering all year long.

15. What is your favorite Holiday Dessert? um, scotch?

16. What is your favorite holiday tradition? I have 7 nieces and nephews and we all gather at my moms for the big family gift circus. After we hand out the gifts, all the kids have to raise their arms straight in the air while we do a big countdown to OPEN. Then it's just nothing but paper and tissue flying everywhere. Sometimes, you have to duck.

17. What tops your tree? a fine layer of lint and dog hair

18. Which do you prefer giving or receiving? honestly, both.

19. What is your favorite Christmas Song? aaaugh, I can't choose just one (I've mentioned the Christmas Music, ahem, problem before, right?) . Top 3: Fairytale of New York--Pogues; White Christmas-Bing; and Merry Christmas from the Family-Robert Earl Keen.

20. Candy Canes! Yuck or Yum? first candy cane? Yum. 50th candy cane? Not so much.


I'm not going to tag anyone but feel free to pick one of these and leave your answers in the comments. It's almost Christmas, y'all! Be Merry!