World of Duh

Hey I'm back. The trip to Arkansas was lovely and fun. I don't mean to imply from my last post that it was all a drunken haze. Wait, yes, yes I do. There were a few moments here and there where there were not any drinks. That would be breakfast at my mom's and watching my niece play softball, but that's only because they occurred before 10am. Anything after that pretty much required a margarita.

I have been stuck in duh ever since we got back. I don't just mean a fog of duh, I mean a world of D.U.H. Duh has me swaddled. It's like my brain fell out when we were gassing up the car in East Texas (I hear that happens a lot out there--heh). I've been doing really stupid things ever since we got home. In the past 3 days I have done all of the following:

Worn a shirt backwards. To the office. All day.

Put hair smoothing gel on my tooth brush. (but my teeth are very shiny and tangle-free now).

Forgotten my own zip code. Twice.

Forgotten to put my parking brake on and come out of a store with my car 10 feet from where I left it.

Initially typed that last sentence using the words "parking break"

I mean, this has to stop, right?