Thursday, March 19, 2009

on the upside, he's cute. On the downside..

Warning: this is about girl stuff. If you don't like reading girl stuff, go play Mafia Wars on Facebook for a while then come back a little later..

You know, you can read about these things as much as you want while you're pregnant, but until they really happen to you, you have no real understanding of how you can go from somewhat normal boobage one day and wake up the next day looking like Dolly Parton got tired of her tiny tatas and went and got a size larger. These things are so full of milk, I swear I woke up yesterday and one of them squirted me in the eye. The other thing not exactly portrayed accurately in the literature is the rabid shark-like way the tiny newborn who isn't supposed to have neck musculature can whip his head around and latch on to your nip so hard it feels like someone installed pliers in his mouth. Jeezus, Louweezus. I would write more, but I have to go wrap these things in cashmere and feathers and hope this pain goes away soon.

1 comment:

Mel Francis said...

welcome to motherhood.