stinkydog

So, last night I went "jogging" with the baby. Note the quotation marks, those are intentional. Because right now my "jogging" more closely resembles what it looks like when someone else is just lurching down the road at a good clip with a tidge more bounce and a lot more hyperventilating. Last year, I was jogging pretty regularly--about three or four times a week, up until the time I found out I was pregnant at which point my doctor told me to cut that out. Apparently, heaving yourself around in 100+ temps=not good for baby growing. So, I embraced this medical directive wholeheartedly. I mean, I tried jogging on the treadmill at the Ladies Gym That Sounds Like A Stripper Bar that I go to, but I felt dizzy and then, my friends, it was Allll Couch, No Treadmill for the next 10 1/2 months. Being the silly that I am, I thought I could just start right back up again as soon as I healed from the Baby Getting Surgery, but alas, a few things have gotten in our way. I shall name them here for you now so you know that I'm not just trying to get out of jogging for the rest of my life, I would just like to make it to where the neighbors aren't clutching their cell phones with their fingers perched above 9 and 1 as they watch me make my way down the street.

Problem #1. My feet don't seem to work very well. There's something I've been dealing with for a few months now that I haven't mentioned here because even though I know there might be a wee bit overshare on a regular basis, I like to think that I can save up all my "Huh, isn't that Medically Weird?" posts for when we're all still blogging at age 97, but here it is: I can't feel my middle toes on both feet. I haven't been able to feel my middle toes since I got a spinal block for surgery back in March. It feels like someone shot my toes full of Novacaine and it just hasn't worn off.. I mentioned it to my doctor once and she said that it would probably wear off eventually. But it hasn't yet and it makes landing on the balls of my feet feel awful and weird, like maybe I'm stepping on a crunchy frog or something. As you can imagine, it makes my stride a little off. It also makes every frog in the vicinity dart for cover.

Problem #2 I'm used to running with my old boobs. These new boobs don't know how to act in an athletic bra, thinking they can go whichever way they want, regardless if it's in the same direction as me, AND, they have the nerve to think that I want them to start working their dairy job right as I'm the furthest distance away from the house. Stop that, dammit.

Problem #3 It's one hundred M*#$@#RF@*@ing degrees at 8pm. Yeah, starting up running outside in Austin during the part of the year that melts cactii: possibly stoopid.

So, we're probably going to have to re-think this jogging thing. Or just Wii-it til the Fall.