If all else fails, go for the Yodelling Pickle

Oh sure, you could just go to Archie McPhee or ToyJoy and do all of your Christmas Shopping in one fell swoop, but what’s the fun in that? Correction, what’s the fun in that after you have already given everyone you know a set of bacon bandages? With that in mind, I’ve put together a little gift-giving guide for you. The Stinkydog Guide to StinkyGifts. Most under $30 and all totally awesome.



1. The Complete Manual of Things that Might Kill You $19.95

I don’t know how any of us ever leave the house without this.

2. Peppermint shot glasses. $6.50

You should give these with a nice bottle of Dripping Springs Vodka… Because you’re not always in the mood for Rumplemintz.


3. Dust Mop Slippers $4.99


whistle while you work.

4. Honeybees $30

Heifer Project is headquartered right outside my home town, but they do good stuff all over the world. Buy someone some honeybees and see how good it feels.


5. A Christmas Story Leg Lamp Ornament $8.99



This is as classic as it gets.

5. Dog Talking Alarm Clock $15.99


For those of you who are missing out on the joy of seven dogs barking at you in the morning.

6. angel wing dog hoodie $18.00




awww, you know sometimes they’re good.

7. movie manners cards $3.50

These are probably much more effective than kicking the back of someone’s seat and/or throwing popcorn at them and hissing “shut yer piehooooole”.

8. Recycled Vinyl Record Journal $16



These are much better than stacking your old vinyl in milkcrates in the garage.

9. Awesome Band Posters around $20 and up

These people sell some purty posters. Including the Wilco one hanging in my office (for those who have asked).


11. Rain boots $19.99

I have an inexplicable love of galoshes for someone who lives in near desert-like weather conditions.


12. Wizard of Oz doorstop $14.75


I have no idea why this tickles me as much as it does.

13. Rifle Charm $24

Because nothing says "girly charm bracelet" like firearms.

14. Muddler $7.99

Include some nice white rum--that would rule out Captain Morgan's or um, Malibu (glargh)--and you have a perfect gift for someone who never drinks enough Mojitos.

15. owling sake cups 24.00


OR, for tiny tiny cups of coffee.

16. Alamo Drafthouse Gift Certificate (name your own price)


Now everyone can have their own Sing-a-Long Experience!


17. Skeleton Lawn Flamingos 29.99

scare your neighbors. C’mon you don’t like them anyway.


18. Stainless Steel Antler coat rack 24.99


And see? No one has to DIE.

19. personal embosser with changeable plates $38.00.


Together with a labelmaker, you could totally go OCD on the personalization of everything in your home and office. Including toilet paper sometimes, just for the hell of it. Not that I have EVER done that…recently.

20. My Last Supper: 50 Great Chefs and Their Final Meals $26

Somehow, I think fried chicken and gouda cheese will not be in this book, but it's probably pretty anyway.


And there you go, shop away!