Stupid Things, part 12

ok, yall know that I've been keeping a running tab of the dumb things people say to pregnant people. And I haven't even shared them all here (Sam can testify!) But I have to say: equally annoying are those people who try to pretend that they haven't noticed you're pregnant, like maybe you just had a really large meal (of like, 57 Big Macs) or something. I mean, yall, there is NO way you would look at me at this point and not know that I am hugely with child. I look like a walking weeble doll. I can't actually bend over to tie my shoes anymore. Walruses flirt with me. So, nice try, you know? But you're not helping.

Like the lady earlier this week with whom I had this conversation:

Lady: awww, that's sweet, are those your grandmothers rings on your necklace?

Me: no they're mine, my fingers are just too fat to wear them right now

Lady: oh really, why?

Me: *blink* *blink*

Me: because I just ate 57 Big Macs.