Whole Crap

Review:

Okay, I'm going to come right out and say that after 10 or so visits to the Whole Foods flagship store, I have determined that I do not like the food they prepare there. This flagship store is the largest Whole Foods in the country. With something like fifteen different little mini-restaurants and several buffet bars, you would think you could find something tasty to eat there, but honestly? I really haven't.

The deli stuff is okay..if you can get a sandwich that has bread you can chew without breaking a tooth. And the pizza is a'ight (but really, how hard is it to to f**k up a pizza?). But the rest of it? Crap. Expensive crap at that. The salad bar is $9 a pound.

People, it's lettuce.

And then they have the whole "Global/Ethnic" food bar (also $9 a pound) which is usually just 18 different curry dishes. Since they charge by the pound, that means you can have approximately 2 pieces of tofu for about $5. I dunno, maybe I've just had unusually bad experiences there, but I once got piece of roasted chicken breast that was so dry it sucked the moisture out of a two-mile radius around me. It's really disappointing because it's really close by my office and I'd love to just bop in for lunch and be able to find whatever I feel like eating that day. But I can only eat Pesto Tortellini that tastes like something my dog might have barfed after a particularly prodigious day of grass eating so many times before I realize that it might just be a hopeless cause.

So, I might keep visiting you for your fantastic bulk snacky nut section, Mr. Whole Foods, but you've lost me for dinner.