Monday, September 17, 2007

I am not who I say I am

I went to apply for a new driver's license two weeks ago (new name and all) and it finally arrived in the mail last Friday. I gotta say, it's a little weird to have one name for thirty six years and then suddenly be called something else. I thought about NOT changing it, but then that didn't feel right either. So what I did was to just keep both names, no hyphen, with my former last name as my middle name and my new last name in the traditional last name spot. My full name has always short, seven letters to be exact. I can handle a couple extra syllables, right? I don't need no stinkin' hyphen.

Except, two days after I receive the new license, I get a note from DPS telling me that after they checked my records, they've concluded that I don't really exist. The Social Security Administration does not have anyone listed with my name as I submitted it (first name- old last name- new last name) and I'm going to have to go prove to them that I do, in fact, inhabit this planet by going to their office, standing in line for three hours and giving them several forms of identification because if I don't, they're just going to have to rescind my driver's license because they're afraid I might be trying to defraud the state of Texas and also, you can't drive if you don't happen to, you know, exist.

Now, I happen to know that I DO exist or at least my dogs like to think I do because I feed them on a daily basis. I also happen to know that the Social Security Administration should know this because I already went there right before I went to the drivers license office.

So, I can only conclude that either:

a) someone lost my paperwork

or

b) my life just got a little complicated BECAUSE OF A @#$%^&! HYPHEN.

happy monday, yall!

3 comments:

The Girl You Used to Know said...

I don't have a hyphen either. They'll find you...

Of course, I didn't legally change my name with the SSA for 6 years after we got married. Maybe I was worried it wouldn't last. LOL

Stinkydog said...

I just spent 3 hours at the Social Security Administration office to find out that a hyphen was in fact inserted and now I have to go apply for a new drivers license. I hate everyone.

Anonymous said...

According to this article,

Thousands of hyphens perish as English marches on

so maybe they are just trying to repurpose them to avoid the slaughter.

Save the hyphens!

:)

P.S. Congrats on the marriage!