Lessons

I know I write a lot about the funny things my kids say. People often think I embellish, but honestly, I really don't, they're just funny. But sometimes... sometimes they're just the opposite.

Today, one of them said something super-duper mean to me. He was mad at me because I wouldn't let him do something and so he was talking poo about how I "didn't want to meet his dark spirit" which is something I'm pretty sure he picked up from Bakugan (which is sort of like Pokemon, but has a more tiresome theme song and much crappier toy production). Point is, I'm not exactly shaking in my boots. He's talking about that and said, "You'd be so scared to meet my dark spirit, you'd run to your Mama...but YOU can't because your mom is DEAD."

Seriously. Those. Words. Came. Out. Of. My. Child's. Mouth.

I stopped what I was doing, stared at him and asked (pretty calmly, I thought) "What did you just say about my mom?" So, he repeats it again, only this time he mumbles it  and I can only guess what my face looked like because his face just immediately crumbles. He bursts into tears, runs over and gives me a hug, sobbing, "I'm sorry! I'm SO SORRY!" over and over again.  I didn't say anything to him, I just walked out of the room to go breathe for a second and let him stew in it for a bit. Ok, probably 400something seconds, but I come back. And at this point, he's thrown himself on the couch and he's wailing. So, I just gathered his snotty heaving mess in my arms and told him I loved him.

But I didn't tell him it was ok. Because it wasn't (isn't). The thing is, I KNOW kids do and say horrible things all the time that they don't mean and this won't be the last time my kid says something to me that cuts straight to the heart and unlike today, he won't always be sorry for it. I didn't tell him it was OK because I don't want him to think it's OK. He's just a kid, sure, but if he's old enough to use words as weapons, he's old enough to know how crappy it can feel when the weapon makes a direct hit.

Will he remember what he learned? Eh. I don't know. He generally doesn't remember where his pants are, even when they're on, but I hope he does. I don't much like these lessons.